Not Even, If You Were the Last Woman on Earth

Put me in a room with 10 guys from all walks of life, all fairly similar in looks (boyishly cute with nice eyes) and all wearing Polo Sport, or maybe Drakkar (my favorite boy smells)...Wait, did you think I was going somewhere with this? I just want someone to put me in a room with 10 guys.

End of post. Good night.


Ok...fine...I have a point. Focus Julie...focus. Put me in the room with 10 guys, and I can guarantee that I will find the emotionally unavailable ones, and immediately fall for them. I am an emotionally unavailable man magnet. Or what I like to call an EMM. If the world is wiped out and I am the last woman on earth...the last man on earth will probably be emotionally unavailable. "Yeah, I would really like to continue the human race with you Julie, but I'm just in a different place right now...maybe we could just be friends...you're great though."

My psychotherapist says that emotionally available men are either married, gay or stalkers. We've turned this into the following EMM test...to be used during dates, random pickups at Lowe's and the occasional emergency evacuation at work. If the man has nicer clothes than I do, he is gay. If the man's clothes are clean and neatly pressed, he is married. If he is wearing no clothes...yes, you guessed it Stalker!!!

I met a fireman online at POF(plenty of fish). And pun intended, the fireman is SMOKING HOT. He sent me a gym picture...and my, oh my...were his guns blazing. He has a giant tribal tattoo on his arm...which makes me all tribal thinking about it. I love a man in uniform, and put him in front of a firetruck...hose me down. Seriously, hose me down. Please. Anyway...he's not the most talkative guy, or that great with technology. But, that's ok...he's really, really nice to look at. Occasionally he sends me a random text that says "want to see you". It's caveman like...and I am ok with that.

We actually haven't met in person, but have exchanged emails, texts and a couple of glorious photos. His pics...and yes, he has seen me. And thinks I am hot...well, so he says. Again, I am ok with this. So, the other night when I get a request from his gmail address to chat via my yahoo account...I didn't think much about it. But, then the following email exchange occurred. Let's see if you can guess where this is going...or went.

Me: Hey ****...this is my gmail account if you want to chat sometime. Hope you had a good weekend. :) Julie

Him: i cant remember how we met. can you refresh my memory? when was the last time we saw each other?

Me:It's Julie from Pof...you sent a chat request to my yahoo account...so thought I would forward my gmail. Everything ok?

Him: what is pof?

Me: Ok, maybe there is a misunderstanding...

Him: you didn't tell me, when did we last see each other?



So...my take on the conversation, albeit very short conversation, was that the person on the other end was not the fireman. My best guess is probably a wife or girlfriend...which makes sense because I am an EMM. I haven't had any other contact with the fireman or his wife...but I am hoping this still works out(think crazy ex, hacking into his email account because she can't let go of him and his tribal tattoo), because there are about 15 women at work who are living vicariously through me on this one. And don't want to let them down...really, it's all for them.